I am not really sure how to explain, but ever since I was a kid I always tried to wear clothes when at home to be more feminine (like, I'd wear t-shirts as if they were skirts, etc). I am AMAB.

As I grew up, I just continued to be completely confused by gender, though likely my social isolation did not help.

At 18, I had considered transitioning, but determined that it would not be the best course of action for me, because I wasn't certain I would be any happier as female than male, so it would not really solve anything in that case.

Over the years, I have kind of fluctuated, and at times I have been under a complete female persona, and other times less so (kind of confusing, but there definitely seems to be more than just "me" in my body, and at times I seem to be just observing rather than actively participating.

So, that likely also leads to gender confusion, because I'm just all over the place quite a lot.

Nowadays, I just identify generally as nonbinary, because I do not feel I am fully male or female, and although I am happier to be referred to in female pronouns/address than male (I hate being called "sir", "Mr", etc, whereas my grocery delivery company accidentally use "Mrs" for my details and it doesn't bother me in the slightest), I generally prefer entirely neutral terms.

I was growing my hair, and I felt more comfortable as I was, but a former friend and several family made numerous comments that were derogatory, and so I decided to just have short hair, because I don't really care nowadays how people perceive me, because I rarely see anyone in person except my autism group (and they are generally accepting of me, and have even discussed how they can be more inclusive for me and any other/future LGBTQ+ members.

I don't know if any of that makes sense, but the TL;DR is that gender is confusing, and I think I am something like genderflux, but generally just use nonbinary and also identify under the trans umbrella.